“It is very interesting”——这句可能是你最常用的表达,但也是最无力的。到底是哪里有趣?有趣到什么程度?读完这句话,读者脑海中一片空白。空洞表达是英语写作中最普遍的问题之一,而解决方法却很简单:用具体细节替换抽象形容词。

📊 厦门灯塔威廉老师批改数据: 超过75%的扣分集中在句子结构单一,而非词汇量不足。而”空洞表达”正是句子结构单一的重要诱因——因为用抽象形容词糊弄过去,就失去了展开的机会。

问题的本质

抽象形容词(good, bad, interesting, important, beautiful)本身不是错,错的是只用它们来概括一切,而不提供任何支撑信息。写作的核心原则是 show, don’t tell——“展示”而非”告知”。

告知(Telling): The movie was interesting. 展示(Showing): The movie kept me on the edge of my seat with its unexpected plot twists and emotionally charged performances.

五组具体改写对比

空洞表达具体细节写法
The food was delicious.The homemade tomato sauce was rich and tangy, and the pasta was cooked to a perfect al dente texture.
The city is beautiful.The city’s narrow cobblestone streets were lined with pastel-colored buildings, and the sunset cast a golden glow over the ancient cathedral.
He is a good teacher.Mr. Chen always arrives ten minutes early to answer questions, and he creates practice exercises tailored to each student’s weak areas.
It is important to protect the environment.Without immediate action to reduce carbon emissions, rising sea levels could displace over 200 million coastal residents by 2050.
The experience was unforgettable.Standing at the edge of the Grand Canyon as the sun rose, I felt the cool morning breeze on my face and heard nothing but the sound of wind echoing through the vast canyon walls.

技术一:五感描写

写作时问自己:我看到了什么?听到了什么?闻到了什么?感觉到了什么?

  • 空洞:The park was crowded.
  • 五感:The park buzzed with laughter and chatter. Children’s feet pounded the grass, and the scent of popcorn and cotton candy filled the warm afternoon air.

技术二:具体事例

不要只说”many people think”,要说谁在什么情况下怎么想。

  • 空洞:Many people like this book.
  • 具体:My 14-year-old sister, who rarely finishes any book, stayed up until 2 a.m. reading it and immediately started it again the next morning.

技术三:数据支撑

用数字说话——数据比形容词有力一百倍。

  • 空洞:Many students struggle with writing.
  • 数据:Over 75% of middle school students in a national survey scored below the “proficient” level in writing assessments.

小练习:改写下面这个空洞句子

原句:The summer vacation was great.

你的改写方向:具体做了什么?怎么great的?能不能用五感或数据?

参考答案: This summer vacation, I volunteered at a local animal shelter for six weeks. Every morning, I walked 15 dogs, cleaned their kennels, and helped prepare their meals. By the end of the summer, I had helped find homes for 12 abandoned pets—the most rewarding experience of my life.

下次写作文时,每写一个抽象形容词,就问自己:能不能换成一个具体的例子、一个数据、一个感官细节?答案如果是”能”,就毫不犹豫地换掉。

📌 相关推荐: 如果你想了解”为什么孩子的作文总是内容空洞”,推荐阅读 《孩子英语作文总是”内容空洞”,根本原因在这里》 —— 从一个真实学生案例出发,帮你诊断内容空洞的根本原因。


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